Democracy Soup

Making sense out of the world of politics

Banker Halloween costume scarier than any monster outfit

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When you’re in a room full of lawyers, as I was this week, you learn a couple of things. One, not all lawyers are bad or are up to no good. Two, this is a time where it’s better to be a lawyer than a banker.

Seriously, could you come up with a scarier costume for Halloween this year? The costume wouldn’t need much makeup or special clothing. Bankers these days are scary.

Now we aren’t talking the tellers that give you money, often for a fee. The tellers are the pawns in this twisted chess game. And we really aren’t talking about the people in the bank who help you with larger problems, telling us that the best savings rate requires a minimum deposit of $10,000 and we still might not get 1%.

Bankers. The ones who try and repossess our homes, even if we didn’t take out a loan with them. Bankers. Those who took the bailout money to fix their mistakes, and turned around and shafted us.

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Full disclosure: I dressed as a wolf/mortgage banker last year. The premise was that the wolf was complaining that its type of work was been farmed out to humans, and the cold, calculated approach of fear and terror was best left to a wolf. The basket (think Little Red Riding Hood) was filled with mortgages and foreclosure notices. While the costume was good enough to win an award, the premise might have been a little ahead of the curve.

Oh, being a mortgage banker was very hip in 2010. People were genuinely scared about the prospect of running into a mortgage banker.

For all the lawyer jokes, and there are many good ones, they don’t feel as sharp as they used to be. Comparing lawyers to sharks feels passé. Comparing bankers to sharks feels like an insult … to the sharks.

Between mortgages, student loan debt, credit card debt, bailout money, anemic savings rates, charging us $5 to use the same debit cards they pushed us to use in the first place — being a banker will be a scary costume for years to come.

This year, I’m not going to be a mortgage banker or any other kind of banker for Halloween. I don’t feel like I can crawl into a role so devious. I’m going to go with something less controversial … like a priest.

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